Hose-pipe ban.

I hear talk of severe drought. It hasn’t rained once since I arrived at my new home (though rumour has it there’s an 80% chance of rain at 4pm today). I had presumed it would simply always be dry & sunny – that it was just the usual climate in this exciting place. But no! Guess what? Humans have actually been praying for rain. Seems to have worked!

One consequence of the water shortage is that a hose-pipe ban has been implemented country-wide. Almost unheard of seemingly. My human is being very cautious with regard to tap-usage. Her water conservation is admirable in the extreme. In reality, some of her methods are very nearly bordering on OTT.

Hose forgotten, the poor old purple window boxes and pink plant pots are unwatered & long dead; literally reduced to a crisp, they are now being utilised as added security ballast at our garden boundaries to protect us from invasion. (Surely it couldn’t be to keep us in?)

The lawn is cooked to a nice shade of toast and the wee drop of water we leave out for the birds seems to rapidly evaporate.

Which brings me to the subject of doggie showers. A deeply personal subject I realise but… they are not on the ‘allowed’ list (in our house at least!). When we return from our beach outings my hairy underbelly is usually clotted with a sand/seaweed combo. Rolling around on prickly, burnt, garden-hay is not an effective way to ‘belly-bathe’ it away, let me announce.

And so…. I often have what I will not so lovingly call ‘an itch’! As I gaze longingly at the redundant hose, I shake, rattle & roll in my attempts to dislodge the beach remnants.

Enter THE GROOMING GLOVE!! Ahhh…magic. One small flaw though…it requires a human hand to operate it …but when I see her approach the shelf where it lies, I become utterly beside myself with excitement. In human terms, you could think of it as comparable to the soothing application of ointment to a horse-fly bite in a difficult to reach spot on your back. Blissfully blissful. Ahhhh…

Musically I choose Adele’s ‘Rumour Has It’ followed by ‘Shake, Rattle and Roll’, ….the Bill Haley and his Comets version ….to accompany this blog. They have the perfect rhythm for medium, progressing to rapid, dog-grooming. Try it on your own pooches! If you have a grooming glove! 😺🎶🐾

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