Today I am dogsitting !!

It started well. She’s beautiful. Such a lovely nature. Kind, calm, quiet, courteous and all mine for the day. Late teens, on the cusp of life, she has just finished her Leaving Cert. I thought she seemed quite forlorn to begin with, so I whined in doggy language to encourage her to come for a walk. Eventually she got the message. I thought it would do her good to get outdoors.

Honestly! She (Andreia is her name) actually thinks she is the one who’s minding me while my human is occupied elsewhere. So funny really 😁. On our return from strolling duties I kept her occupied with a bit of scratching & cuddling.

But she was extremely restless; fidgeting with her phone which wasn’t giving her any apparent joy. I wondered if having the WiFi code might calm her down a bit…. but how would I communicate that to her.

Telepathy!! I willed her to walk towards my human’s secret place where the code is stored …and voilá … she found it. That kept her hushed for a short time so I went for a snooze.

However, I awoke with a start- as her edginess suddenly returned and she just took off at speed!! It was almost as if she had received a message from on-high. Down the hallway she went, into the utility room, emerging with a long pole, & pulling at the ceiling-mounted attic door. Oh, I came to the immediate conclusion that she is worse than the ‘terrible twos’ that I have heard so much about. I hadn’t realised exactly what I was taking on when I agreed to take care of her. Truthfully, I couldn’t take my eyes off her for a minute.

Obviously I was unable to climb the attic ladder so I had to trust my two favourite senses to try & ascertain what she was getting up to. The musty, hot odour which swept down from above was uninformative, but turned into a sensory experience and a half (for me). Andreia sounded as if she was choking slowly. Then…. a long silence …. followed by the reassuring sounds of clunk and clank which echoed down in my direction as her skull hit the overhead beams above. Phew! She was alive.

A dripping, sweaty, dusty face peered down from the garret as she gasped for a lungful of fresh(er) air – in fairness it was very hot, even at floor level. I tried the telepathy trick again but the message wasn’t getting through to her. Off she went again into the depths and as I helplessly hoped she wouldn’t land down through the ceiling, I could hear stuff being shuffled around the place. Then, as suddenly as it had started the attic excursion was halted.

Into the wardrobe in the back room she headed next 🙈 rattling her way through boxes of documents & bags of old envelopes which had been kept ‘in case they ever came in handy!’ What could she be looking for? This dogsitting lark was turning into the most stressful day of my newfound life.

Wait! Was that the CTTIASUV I heard? Oh thank goodness my human had returned. She’d know what to do. Aw…Janey Mack!!! After a perfunctory greeting in my direction (thought she’d be more delighted to see me😢) both of them headed back up into the attic 💩

At least I could hear some chat between the pair of them this time. Turns out they were looking for an old sporting photograph for Uncle-Uncle…(whoever he is?) … and he’d be so thrilled if they found it ….and it had to be there somewhere… and did you look in this box 👀…and OUCH!! And then, shuffling paper & eventually like music to my ears ‘found it!’

A large drop of salty sweat 💦 was my first inkling that they were about to return to terra firma. Looking like two coal miners they staggered backwards down the ladder. My human clutched the treasured photo. (It didn’t look worth the bother to me…). Turns out it features on page 86 of my human’s book (Suitcase Number Seven-a rugby story with a difference) but Uncle-Uncle wants a copy of the original. A tennis photo? In a book about rugby? Don’t ask!

Honestly the two humans were both so sweaty/dirty when they descended from the loft, they had to have a shower & change clothes.

So Uncle-Uncle, whoever you are, if you are reading my blog, I hope you are very grateful to all three of us for our gargantuan efforts on your behalf. My human will post it to you in the coming days. Genuinely, I was soooo stressed today. Dogsitting is not all it’s cracked up to be.

The song ‘The Old Maid in the Garret’ from the album ‘Home Boys Home’ by the Clancy Brothers & Tommy Makem sounds like the perfect choice for today.

But then someone else might suggest ‘Misirlou’ from Pulp Fiction😂 as sung by Dick Dale and his Del-Tones 🎶🐾

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